Kheng Hua, Actress
Has there been a moment when you felt your age? How did that make you feel?
Just yesterday, actually! I was doing a dramatic reading at a rehearsal, from a hard copy book, and after 40 minutes or so, I started to see double words on the page—even with glasses. Every week, something happens to make me feel like I am getting older. But I never ever feel like I want to turn back time.
Would you say that you feel more like yourself with each passing year?
One hundred percent. Feeling like myself is deeply important to me, and increasingly so as I move towards the day I am no longer here. But more important than feeling like myself is knowing myself, and keeping the parts of myself I want to keep.
Is there a single word that sums up the way your relationship has changed with your body and self over the years?
The word is more like a feeling and an expression: “Whew!”. Every day—and I really mean every day—I am so thankful my body can still do what I want it to do, and there are so many things I do every day that I still want to do. And when I think about my ‘body and self’, I include my brain, my soul, my spirit. Whew! Everything is still moving, feeling, growing, changing. I’m still alive and well.
Similarly, do you feel that your attitude towards getting older has changed from when you were younger?
I’ve never had a mindset of wanting to look or feel younger. It’s not in my DNA. I am always engrossed in a multitude of other things at any moment. But not that. I see it as a waste of time. There is no such thing as anti-ageing. My strong interest in other things has freed me from the shackles of chasing youth and, instead, valuing how my age can add to my joy and purpose. I may do many things with my life that can be construed as ‘anti-ageing’. I don’t drink or smoke. I move my body. I sleep and wake early. But all this has nothing to do with ‘anti-ageing’ and everything to do with what makes me happy. I think it’s an awful way of living if trying not to age is a part of your daily life.
If you could leave us with a parting message on what it means to age gracefully, what would it be and why?
Just do what you can while doing what you love. And please, leave your ego at the door.
Lakshmi Krishnan, Dance instructor at Temple of Fine Arts Singapore
After 30 years of teaching dance, what are the biggest physical and emotional changes you’ve noticed in yourself?
Probably the injuries [laughs]. I thought it was a dead end and then I realised it’s never too late to work on strength, fitness and a stronger version of myself. I do feel that I’ve focused more on building my mental resilience over the last couple of years as well, and am now a more positive person all around.
Do you feel more like yourself as the years go by?
More like myself, definitely. I’ve gained more awareness on who I am and who I want to be. Dance has helped with that— it has allowed me to discover my true self. For many years, I felt constricted by others’ expectations of me. I felt like I had to behave or do things in a certain way. I was conditioned to be a people-pleaser, you could say [laughs]. But now I realise it’s more important to do things that make me happy. I stopped colouring my hair, for instance, and it didn’t bother me even when people commented on it. I like myself better like this.
Has your idea of strength and health changed over the years?
I feel that younger folk need to start thinking about ageing much earlier. People in their 30s and 40s need to start looking at what it means to lose muscle and get fit and also eat right. The process has to start much earlier especially for women. It’s never too late, I am a good example of that, but it’ll be an easier process for you if you start considering these things at an earlier age. Wellness is also not just about physical fitness but mental too, so what we think and speak matter.
Do you think we talk enough about ageing positively?
I feel that I’ve been talking about it, but only because I started a class for older women at the Temple of Fine Arts. It’s a non- judgmental space where they learn how to dance and move. There’s this strong feeling of community where we talk about the things we go through and what we’ve been doing to cope with such changes. I firmly believe that the more of these types of conversations we have, the more we can learn from each other and glean hope from one another. As I age I have also been drawn to do creative work revolving around ageing. One such work that I am choreographer for is Terminal Two, a theatrical production involving music and dance that’s being staged in July by Temple of Fine Arts.
What does ageing gracefully mean to you, in a nutshell?
Ageing is inevitable, but when you do happy things and live life without regret, you can most certainly age gracefully.
Nora Samosir, actress and educator
You’ve been an actor, director and vocal coach over the last 10 years. How has your perspective on your career evolved?
You could say I’ve always been somewhat unconventional. I became a teacher because I believed I had the talent for it. However, I didn’t sign up to be an MOE teacher with a guaranteed pension. I wanted to weave between two worlds: teaching and theatre. My move from NUS to Lasalle marked a deliberate shift from academic teaching towards professional training. Around the same time, I had begun exploring performance as research with a collaborator, forming the duo Wandering Women. This was the vehicle for me to move beyond acting in plays and into creating original theatre work. I suppose the evolution for me is being able to continually find new expressions of theatre and choosing the challenge of the unknown over the comfort of the conventional.
How do you handle uncertainty and anxiety surrounding health and growing older?
Pray, then do.
Tell us about what strength, health and wellness look like to you today.
Temperance, not just self-control. Be positive and choose to do what is good for your body.
On that note, do you feel more or less like yourself with each passing year?
When I look at my face or when I find it difficult to move in a particular way, that is when I feel each passing year. At heart, I think I’m still 20.
Technology and social media have altered the way individuals age as well as how they perceive ageing. If you could give a piece of advice to your students with regard to what it means to age gracefully, what would it be and why?
Keep your mind open to all possibilities, experiences, ways of thinking; then choose to do what is true to you—your beliefs, your relationships, your sense of humanity. The search for truth would guide you to age without regrets.
Get your copy of the June ‘Embody’ issue of Vogue Singapore online.
